Beware: I think I'm gonna rant.
I don't know why, but I was thinking about this today and it just struck me as odd. How many well-meaning parents let their kids believe in Santa (either through encouragement or through their silence)? Lots. I was one of them. My folks may have reservedly mentioned that the red-suited chub didn't exist, but when the 8-o'clock news came on, the whole family looked for the Santa Radar to show us where he was. We did the milk and cookies too.
Now, no kid in their right mind is going to turn down some free gifts, so what do they do? Make a list, checking it twice against their sibling's to make sure it's longer, give it to their folks and go sit on Santa's knee to see if we can fake him into believing that we have been the purest of angels all year 'round. Kids are the best actors in the world. And Bill Cosby was right, we'll say the darndest things. "Have you been good this year?" "Sure have, Mr. Red. I know because I can remember every word I've ever said and every thing I ever did for the last twelve months. I am a prodididigy, can't you tell?" Inevitably, what does Red-us Imposter-us tell the kid? "Sure, you can have whatever you want." What does the kid think? "I'm getting everything I asked for." Who foots the bill? The parents.
With the ransom note for the child's happiness in hand, the parents are then left with some decisions: go into debt to get them the latest whatever, or expect that the Red guy in the mall's La-Z-Boy really will get it for them ... yeah, right.
I don't know about you, but the whole situation strikes me as a bit of a "bad babysitter" story. Sitter comes to the house, the parents leave for the night. The sitter tells the kids they can have and do whatever they want, and proceeds to fill them with candy. Parents return to hyper and demanding kids, and the sitter smiles and says, "Hope you can deal with the mess I've made for you." As a kid, I was oblivious--not a care in the world except for getting what I wanted. As a parent, I'm really not a fan of the one-sided deal because it's not in my favor. Can you guess why? It's because Santa doesn't exist and we have to foot the bill for our extraodinary commercial appetites.
So, question for all the wise ones out there. Since most parents don't think there's a bearded, red spandex-wearing fat guy planning on breaking in your house in the middle of Christmas Eve night (because there isn't), how do you talk to your kids about the whole deal? From experience, I understand that you just grow out of it, but in the meantime what are we teaching our kids about commercialism, selfishness, coveting, expectations and the like? And how concerned should we be? I haven't figured this thing out, so I'd really like to get some input on this. Let me know what you think.
5 comments:
Great question, Josh. We landed on telling them that Santa is a game that some families play. We can even joike about it...but we know it's a game. That way they don't grow up to be the AntiClause, but they still have a clue that mom and dad are the gatekeepers for most things good.
Randy, that seems like a pretty good way to handle it. For the most part I've bordered on the whole "it's a lie from the pit of Hades" mentality, but that was just my initial knee-jerk reaction to the commercialism of it all. As with most other things in my life, I was using a nuclear bomb to get rid of a weed ... way over-reactionary, which I know isn't the best.
The idea that it is all a game is a great strategy though. It solves a lot of issues up front instead of just making a bigger mess to clean up later. Thanks for your thoughts.
Who else? What did your families do? Was it good or bad?
There is some history to the whole St Nicolaus thing. We presented it that way. We made sure to let them know that reindeer don't fly well(they hit the ground pretty hard when pushed out a plane)and that he probably never saw one. It really helps to put the servant slant to it all. The giving to the poor and all seems to line up well with Jesus' teaching.
Cool pic. Kinda like the witch slammed in to the side of the house decoration seen at haloween. (There's a holiday that's meaning will turn your stomach.)
I told Santa at Crown Center last year that I wanted a Conair Nose and Ear Hair Trimmer, but he just chuckled and gave me a pack of crayons. Never did get that nose and ear hair trimmer, though.
Jackson,
You may want to take up the trimmer issue with your folks. I hear they are the "gatekeepers for most things good". And believe me, it's a good thing to not have your nosehair tickling your bottom lip.
Josh
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